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The Spiritual Side of Writing
by Joyce Lavene

"Giving Up"

“That’s it!” a friend said to me recently. “I give up! I can’t take one more rejection!”

Having heard this before, I wisely stayed silent and let her rave.

“I spent months making that book the way they wanted to see it! I knew this was my big break. Then they sent it back. It’s not exactly what they wanted. Why didn’t they say that right away?”

If I had the answer for this question, I would be a millionaire! Even more importantly, I would get published every time I sent something out! I would never get rejected again!

But I didn’t have the answer six months ago for my friend and I still don’t have it today. My friend, a romance writer, totally gave up. She threw  away all of her books about writing and getting published. She burned her manuscripts. She even fed her disks of back work to the trash  compactor. (Don’t try this at home!)

She threw herself into her ‘real’ job as an accountant. Took some classes at the community college to start moving forward in her profession. She put it all behind her. All the hurt and the rejection and the frustration. She didn't need it in her life. She had her family and her friends and a good job. Why put herself through the meat grinder that is publishing today?

Last month, she told me that she was slipping. She’d seen a man standing on a street corner, hailing a taxi. Something about the way he looked made her think about where he was going. Did he have a family? Was he single and looking for the perfect woman?

“It’s like an addiction,” she confessed in a late night email. “I don’t want to tell those stories in my head but God help me! I can’t stop!”

Then she passed a sidewalk sale and there was a fairly new Writer’s Market on the cart. The sun was warm and the air was sweet. She bought it before she realized what she was doing then hid it from her family. A thesaurus joined it, followed by a dictionary. Before anyone realized what was happening, she was telling her husband that she was going to work out at the 'Y'. But she was spending her time writing in her car.

Fortunately, this woman has a wise and understanding husband who kept back up copies of all of her work. Last week, she had her first book published. Today, she told me that she’s worried about ever getting another book published. And so it goes!

For all of us in the writing business, sometimes it seems easier to give up rather than to go on. How many times have you been tempted to turn off the light and never go back into that dark place of fear and rejection? But we all share the same love of words and a need to have our work read. It keeps us going even when we think we’ve given up. Even when we’re sure we can’t write one more word.

So don’t give up yet. Try one more time. And stay away from the trash compactor!

SHARE YOUR IDEAS WITH ME ON THIS AND UPCOMING COLUMNS! joyce@joyceandjimlavene.com

Joyce Lavene writes a little bit of everything with her husband/partner, Jim. They live in North Carolina with their three grown children and two grandchildren. She welcomes visitors to her websites:

http://www.joyceandjimlavene.com
http://www.sharynhowardmysteries.com